The deed is done!

After a bit more spotting and a very depressing Friday meltdown, my guy and I decided it was time to take a big step and call up the local specialist. We've got an RE appointment Jan. 2, and I'm actually excited and relieved, eager to know what someone who deals with this problem all the time will see in the strange data I've gathered over the last year or so.

It's a big step for me and my guy. I've been resisting actively the "industrial" approach to fertility treatment (for lack of a better word--not to say that it doesn't work for many women). To go see someone and seriously consider more intense pharmaceutical and medical options is a major move for me. Perhaps I'm coming out of denial, aware that I might indeed need more help than I want to think. But damn it, it has been over two years, and while my periods are improving, facts is facts.

Stupidly, a gal from a wonderful singing group I belong to (a totally awesome woman, but clearly never set foot near IF lalaland) was wondering who would be pregnant for this year's annual spring concert. All the non-mothers in the group flinched and vowed that it would not be them. I cringed, too, but for a different, probably more annoying reason--though you never know what women have gone through--and kept my mouth shut. I thought, "Yeah, right. Like it would be me." I'm laughing typing this, but it was really fucking irritating at the time. I think I'm going to have to gently find a way to alert my singing buddies to my plight, just to prevent them from saying stupid shit without thinking.

Mission Accomplished and Why I Love Acupuncture

Most gals' blogs I read who've tried acupuncture never seem to have the kind of experience I do during most treatments. Basically, it's like legal drugs. I leave even so-so treatments feeling pleasantly relaxed. But the really killer sessions, the ones that have made a believer out of me, are the ones that feel like everything is suddenly being shifted into place, like I've just had the most satisfying meal of my life. I love my acupuncturist. She's very calm and conservative in her treatment approach and she's managed to help me reduce a lot of the anxiety, stress, bad habits, and general unhealthiness I'd slipped into in recent years. Anyway, after hearing my symptoms and listening to my pulse, she decided to use moxa, which is smoldering powered mugwort, to warm certain points on the meridians. I felt like someone had poured warm comfort into my aching muscles and my joints, as I walked to the library from my appointment, moved smoothly and effortlessly. And my spotting has been banished once more, accompanied by a nice upswing in energy and mood.

On the Western front, I saw my gyno, also a delightful woman. She was all for trying my experiment and upping my 'roid dosage, so now I'm up to 100 mcg. It takes a few weeks for the benefits to kick in, and but hopefully, we'll soon get me down below 2 on the TSH scale. I know I'm going to feel great when we get there and we'll see if pregnancy results.