Not content to simply write off my intense, despair-inducing fatigue as Pepys's doing, I was in serious doubt of my sanity and health this morning. Why the fuck, I wondered, do I feel so very shitty?
Am I depressed? Like, clinically so? Am I ill? Am I just a lazy bum who doesn't want to get up and go to work? Am I just an idiot who's got herself trapped in a bunch of jobs and duties she hates?
After a tearful, unproductive discussion with my guy, who insisted I pull myself together and get to work since I had already had my weekly leeching to check my "progress," I stormed off on my bike--is that really possible? Well, okay I peddled off like a heartsick banchee on my bike. I felt bad when I got up this morning, despite a long afternoon of rest at home, and now I felt even worse after having yet another vial of blood drawn. I wanted to puke, pass out, weep, all at the same time.
When I got to work, I mentioned my symptoms to my very kind and caring boss. She noted that I sounded anemic.
Wait a second here, folks! You mean if I've been bleeding for ten days, eating no meat or leafy veggies, and avoiding vitamins, I could be mildly anemic? You've got to be kidding me!
Seriously, though: I'm tired, I'm sad, I'm panting when biking up hills or trudging up stairs, and last but not least I'm craving venison and mutton and rare steaks. And I'm a vegetarian. So I'm going to get me some flesh for lunch and discuss this idea with Nurse Sweetie.
Isn't it funny how a diagnosis can be comforting? I'm not irrationally insane! It's not all in my head that I can't seem to feel rested, no matter how much I relax or sleep! I may someday feel better! Very comforting.
ETA:
Just got my hCG results: down to the 400s. So no scary return to rising numbers. I'm going to see Dr. Spunk on Monday morning, but will work on getting more iron, calcium, and other good stuff until then.
Thursday, September 18, 2008
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5 comments:
Yes, that's entirely possible. Make sure you get the iron with calcium, it will help the absorbtion.
Yes, do get a blood test for anemia and treat it if you've got it -- it's amazing how debilitating it can be. (Note of caution: I was sure I was anemic after my m/c but they threw in a pregnancy test when they took my blood and that's when I learned that my m/c was incomplete.) Not trying to jinx you! I'm sure you're just in need of a good dose of iron!!
Ah ha! That makes a great deal of sense. Yes, anemia can be debilitating. Hope a good dose of iron helps bring you back to somewhere near feeling good.
Not to start an international incident (or perhaps interprovincial would be closer to the truth) with Mrs. Spit, but I believe that calcium and iron should be taken apart from each other, as my understanding is that the calcium binds to the iron and you wind up not absorbing either one. I take iron in the morning and calcium at night, as recommended by my naturopath. Might be worth checking out.
Hope you're feeling much better very soon.
I'm glad your numbers are going down - I hope that the downward trend continues swiftly.
Good luck with the iron. I vote for lots of spinach instead of pills.
I think if you start feeling better it may be time for a visit from me?
I think my vegetarian friend is in the market for a hearty organic slab o' red meat with some spinach, beans, and molasses cookies for dessert.
seriously though, your body has been through so much with the meds and the shots that it's not surprising how you feel. add blood loss and emotional turmoil to that and you've got a recipe for exhaustion. hope you are taking good care of yourself!
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